Target to Host “Take A Tranny to Work Day”

 

targetAfter announcing it will allow customers to use the restroom of their choice, Target has taken the measure one step further.

In an internal memo, Target officials announced that the company has designated July 5 as “Take A Tranny to work Day.” The event will be held at all Target locations throughout the United States.

Target CEO Brian Cornell said, “This is yet another important measure to demonstrate Target’s support for the LGBT community and their families.”

Cornell estimates that nearly 80 percent of Target’s employees are either transsexual or know someone who is.

“Clearly, the vast majority of Americans know someone who does not know which sex he or she is,” said Cornell. “Even when you take out from the equation the majority of Millennials who feel they either have to be a transsexual or gay to be cool, the numbers are outstanding. The vast majority of us know a transsexual. We need to be more inclusive, celebratory, and eager to learn from this amazing subculture.”

Target employees who bring a transsexual to work during the event will have the opportunity show them how the store operates and interacts with customers. Visiting transsexuals will be given tours of both the men’s and ladies’ rooms and the opportunity to try the different apparatuses each restroom offers.

“I can’t wait to squat into a men’s urinal,” said Janelle Kepler, a college junior who recently realized that she is a man. “I’m not going to get a sex change—not yet at least—so it will be exciting to test my flexibility on the men’s toilet.”

John Reamers of Enola, Pa, is ecstatic even though he says he’s a heterosexual at the moment.

“I’m just excited that I can pretend to be a tranny so I can use the women’s room to get a peak at some hot chick with her pants down,” said Reamers. “I applaud Target for giving perverts like myself free views of naked women and hard working pedophiles access to little girls.”

In addition to the day’s events, Target plans to provide customers 25% discounts on items intended for the opposite sex.

“There will be something for everyone,” said Cornell. “Just remember to bring the kiddies!”

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